The Power of Fear

While today was a busy day, this post won’t be too long.

I want to start tonight by telling you about my discussion in January with the vice president for student affairs. He summoned me to his office over winter break, when the university was closed, and refused to tell me why we were meeting. I got there and requested that I be able to have representation since he had the dean of students by his side. I was told that that would not be allowed. I asked to leave. He asked me to stay. I should have left, but I didn’t. That was my first mistake. We spoke for a little while, and at one point he asked me about the December 25th Email. I should have refused to answer his question. That was my second mistake. Instead, I was scared, and I lied. That was my third mistake. I apologize to all of you: It was a mistake that should not have been made. Like I said yesterday, I hope you’re still with me.

There are two more things I want to talk briefly about tonight:

The president, in his memo yesterday (linked on the right), made the claim that “the University did not, has not, and will not sue Jess Zimmerman.” The lawsuit that the university filed against “John Doe” (me) remains open in the court system and remains a very big threat both to me and to all of those who feel they can’t speak out about what is happening on campus. I’ve started a counter, also on the right, that will tell you how long the lawsuit has remained active since the president promised the University community the school would not be pursuing it.

Tonight there was a public forum organized by a small group of faculty to discuss this topic, and discourse in general, and I want to thank everyone who came. It was a very, very emotional evening for me and, to be honest, I’m a little drained right now. Surrounded by interested and passionate students and faculty, I felt I was in extremely good company. I felt supported, and I wasn’t the only one. One of the students who spoke said that she had been afraid to send an Email that expressed her concerns about the actions of the administration. With such support around her, she stood up and said she was no longer afraid. It was the support in that room that helped eradicate her fear, and I hope that that support continues to spread throughout campus. While much of what was discussed tonight revolved around me and this situation specifically, I think we are beginning to see this issue as a much bigger one. What the administration is doing to me, they can do to anyone on campus who feels the need to speak out. It sets a dangerous precedent for the academic community at Butler and on other campuses. When so many of us band together to protect the rights of any one of us, the rights of all of us are protected. For now, I want to know what you thought. If you went, what did you take away from tonight’s discussion? What are your thoughts about what was said?

One last thing before closing: I’ve linked to a copy of Butler University English Professor Bill Watts’s reaction to the president’s October 19th memo to faculty.